Sunday, May 23, 2010

"I want you to sing with rapture and dance like a dervish"

If you are a young woman or the father of a grown-up unmarried daughter, 
you should rent 'Meet Joe Black' and watch. It's a well scripted movie, and the 
acting by Anthony Hopkins (one of my favorite actors) is superb!!
 
Here is one of my favorite scenes in the movie. I love this scene. In this scene, Anthony Hopkins
advises his daughter to find REAL LOVE, and disapproves her relationship 
with a very "successful" (by traditional measures) guy. Really a contrarian 
father figure!
Watch it before you reead the post:-)
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9EV3DKPo-4U
Just a bit more background: Parrish is a very wealthy businessman. His only 
daughter Susan is considering getting married to a guy, Drew, that works for 
her Dad. Drew is a Harvard grad with an impeccable career record. He is 
everything (ambitious, smart, handsome, loyal) any dad would want in his 
son-in-law. But passionate and philosophical Parrish has other thoughts for 
his daughter.
 In an effort to make it more entertaining, I have come up with a crude, 
alternative, and a practical Indian version in RED just for fun.
(Sorry for the confusing mixed up red and black text, but please try to take one 
pass reading only the black text from the movie, and second pass, if you are 
interested, read the RED text, father and daughter conversation in *real*
world
 
Now here is the scene in the movie...Parrish and Susan are in a chopper on 
their way to a  function in NY I believe. 
(again read only BLACK text first all the way down.)
 
         PARRISH  I know it's none of my business --
 What are you talking about??!!
        Susan doesn't answer for a moment, then impulsively kisses her
         father on the cheek. 
Susan looks at her mom for help  
        SUSAN  No, it's none of your business. 
Dad, please I am a grown up
  Another moment.
        PARRISH  Do you love Drew? 
WHat is this crap about love? I have already "arranged" a marriage for you
        SUSAN  You mean like you loved Mom? 
Dad, you and Mom had an arranged marriage. See how well that has 
turned out?!
        PARRISH  Forget about me and Mom -- are you
  going to marry him?
 Forget about me and Mom. You are going to marry the guy I picked.
        SUSAN  Probably. 
No way
 A moment.
        PARRISH   (smiles)
  Don't get carried away. 
I will kill you if you say another word about this guy
        SUSAN  Uh oh --

        PARRISH  Susan, you're a hell of a woman.You've got a great career, 
you're beautiful --
        SUSAN  And I'm your daughter and no man
  will ever be good enough for me.
        PARRISH  Well, I wasn't going to say that -- 
Well, the guy I picked has all the qualifications to be your husband
        SUSAN  What were you going to say? 
 What about the guy I love?
        PARRISH  Listen, I'm crazy about the guy -- He's smart, he's aggressive, 
he could carry Parrish Communications into the 21st century and me along with it.
The guy you love is an idiot, just a BCom degree, 
He belongs to a lower caste. Their family background is horrible. 
They own liquor businesses. you say "but he loves me"?
        SUSAN  So what's wrong with that?
        PARRISH  That's for me.  I'm talking about
  you.  It's not so much what you say
  about Drew, it's what you don't say.
        SUSAN  You're not listening --
        PARRISH  Oh yes, I am.  Not an ounce of excitement, not a whisper of a
        thrill, this relationship has all the passion of a pair of titmice. 
No responsibilities, nothing. What about family reputation? They don't have any 
land or any other assets
        SUSAN  Don't get dirty, Dad --
        PARRISH  Well, it worries me.  I want you to get swept away. 
        I want you to levitate.  I want you to sing with rapture and dance 
        like a dervish. 
Well, it worries me. I want you to think about your future with him. How is he 
going to feed you with a BCom degree? They don't even have a car. 
Our social status is much higher
         SUSAN  That's all? 
But I am happy with him. He loves me
         PARRISH  Be deliriously happy.  Or at least leave yourself open to be. 
Love is alll bullshit. Be practical. Money is what will keep a relationship going
         SUSAN  'Be deliriously happy'.  I'm going to do my upmost -- 
Money keeps us happy?!! Dad?!!
          He smiles. 
He frowns,
         PARRISH  I know it's a cornball thing but love is passion, obsession,
          someone  you can't live without.  If you don't start with that, what are 
          you going to end up with?  I say fall head over heels.  Find someone you
          can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back.  And how do
          you find him?  Forget your head and  listen to your heart.  I'm not
          hearing any heart. (a moment)
          Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back.  Because, the truth is
          there is no sense living your life without this.  To make the journey
          and not fall deeply in love -- well, you haven't lived a life at all.
          You have to try.  Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived. 
What you guys have is not love. It's infatuation. Guy gives you attention, 
and the woman thinks it's the end of the world. This fantasy will not last. 
Six months into marriage, the thrill ride is over, and the reality sets in. 
This is your first time, but the world has seen this a billion times. 
Here is what I want you to understand. Marriage is more a responsibility than a 
fun ride. Get over it! You will understand it 20 years down the road 
when your daughter comes home and proposes to be with a loser that wants
 to feed her and take care of her with love. It is important to marry a guy 
that is financially responsible and has career prospects. 
Love will happen automatically!
            SUSAN  Bravo. 
Bravo
             PARRISH  Aw, you're tough.
 Don't act tough
           SUSAN  I'm sorry.  But give it to me again.
  The short version. 
Dad I cannot do what you are asking me to do
          PARRISH  Stay open.  Who knows?  Lightning could strike.
That's it, you are grounded. Lock her up. You are not leaving the house!

1 comment:

  1. You've brought out the contrast between East and West very nicely! East has become more material now: rigid social structures over centuries have stifled growth on that plane. On the other hand the West having plumbed the depths in material pursuit is becoming more spiritual.

    Love is one way of looking at the institution of marriage. But the Eastern thought distilled over ages has found that a stable marriage is more important than mutual love (at the beginning). All civilized nations, East or West, believe the building blocks of social structures starts with the individual family.

    True, as you point out, today East has corrupted the helpfulness and mutual growth that is the aim of a good relationship, into one of compatibility for material pursuits.

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